Sunday, January 31, 2010

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Won at poker :)


Well I won everything at poker tonight $320 for 1st place in the comp a ticket to a $5000 game in February and a free entry into the World series of poker tourny which is worth millions :) wish me luck!!!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

brain explosion (techy boring stuff)

I just had a brain explosion, got home from a drive in the new wheels :) popped a coldie (beer) (its Australia day) and decided to finish installing windows on a laptop thats in for repair. I know I'm a boreing old fart working on a public holiday but I was actually chatting on the internet at the same time. Anyway this is the boreing bit no doubt, I had finished installing windows and moved photos back onto the new install and loaded Trend antivirus etc all ready to go, just i noticed there were two  instances on win xp home at boot time ie the screen is black and it has a choice before it goes to the windows screen, this slows things up so I delete the obsolete entry in the boot.ini, (There's a hidden file in the root of your boot drive that not many people know about, called "boot.ini". It controls what happens at boot time.) I made a booboo and instead of using notepad to delete the entry I deselected the time to show boot devices option lol with the wrong one selected the laptop wont boot lolololol sooooooooooooo DO NOT PASS GO ROBERT GO DIRECTLY TO THE BARBIQUE DO NOT COLLECT $200 AND REPAIR WINDOWS M8.

I'm so boreing I nearly fell asleep there I havent a clue why I'm telling the world about this anyway.

Its been a hot and humid day here and I'm glad I have air conditioning unlike my brother in law George who decry's it all the time I think its a wonderful invention.

I am often assailed by Orstralians for being a pommie b...d whereupon I inform that I am a naturalised Ossie, lift my fringe to reveal the lobotomy scar.

An Aussie pirate walks into a bar with a wooden leg, a hook and an eye patch.
The Barman says 'Sheesh - How'd you lose the leg'
The Pirate says 'Arrrrr - A shark took it off at the knee'
The Barman says 'Thats no good, what about the hand?'
The Piarate says 'Arrrrg - Lost it in a bloody bar brawl'
The Barman says 'Jeez - Well what about the eye then?'
The Pirate says 'Thats easy a seagul crapped in it' The Barman says 'What?!?!' The Pirate says 'Arrrrrrr...I'd only had the hook one day...'

An Englishman, an Irishman and an Australian walk into a bar.
The barman says, "Is this some kind of bloody joke?"

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Water Water everywhere and Desalinated stuff to drink


Well it rained off and on last night which ran off into the sea meantime the Dam at Warragamba which was last full in 1998 is at 57% Sydney will get its first taste of desalinated water this week. About 1.5 million residents in the city's inner west, east and Sutherland Shire will get some or all of their drinking water from the $1.9 billion seawater treatment plant at Kurnell. The desalination treatment works are going to mean elevated water costs and if the government had been advised that, in general El-Nino droughts do not hit so hard in areas nearer the coast they would/ should have made a dam on the coast side of the mountains.
The Tallowa dam in shoalhaven often overflows even in drought times it is at 100% today why? well because the dam is in the right bliddy place grrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Just think ?I could have saved us $1.9 billion if only they had asked.


 ...Let us suppose that the Enterprise is doing some sort of research mission to an unknown planet. I think the Captain's Log would be worth a look:




Captain's Log, Stardate 54324.5: Starfleet Command has directed the Enterprise to do a preliminary exploration of planet --- in advance of a full research team. Scanners report the atmosphere to be breathable, but are receiving confusing readings with regard to life forms. I am beaming down with a landing party composed of all our chief officers except for poor Scotty.



Supplement: Redshirt Riley has received a head injury, apparently while exploring under a high rock shelf. He reports only hearing a loud sound and jumping before being struck. After examination by Dr. McCoy he has been judged capable of continuing duty.



Supplement: We have encountered an alien creature on this planet. While it does not itself seem menacing, a unfortunate occurrence took place when it was present. Specifically, on my orders Lt. Sulu withdrew his phaser. The creature disappeared leaving a puff of smoke, immediately following which a loud noise was heard next to Sulu. Sulu fired, hitting Ens. Chekov. Oddly enough, although Sulu's weapon was set to stun, Chekov was also covered with a black powder similar to soot. Mr. Chekov has been sent back to the ship for examination and quarantine.



Stardate 54326.2, Mr. Spock reporting: Tricorder readings indicate that the creature we encountered earlier is constantly moving at great speed over the surface of the planet. We have encountered the creature once again. In an attempt to slow the creature for study, I attempted to fire on it. The creature, however, appeared to move faster than the phaser beam. Regretfully, the beam struck an outcropping of rock above the Captain's head, causing it to break off and fall. Although it appears that several tons of rock fell squarely on the Captain, he was driven straight into the ground but apparently not seriously injured, though stunned. The Captain has been beamed up to Sickbay, leaving me in command of the research party.



Captain's Log, Stardate 54342.1: The creature is still at large on the planet's surface. While Mr. Spock continues to lead a research party I am currently at work with Mr. Scott on an Acme Pressure Cooker for our lab, for when the creature is finally apprehended.



Captain's Log, stardate 54342.3. The strange occurences that have dogged the landing party since our arrival at this planet have led me to believe that the creature is in some way directly responsible for them. Mr. Chekov and I have both been declared fit for return to duty, though Dr. McCoy has entered in his medical log that he feels we should be kept under observation. Mr. Spock has constructed a device which he suspects should be able to counteract the creature's incredible speed as follows: We have placed a dish of birdseed out in the open, with several signs pointing to it. The dish is atop a cleverly concealed trap door, which will open when any weight falls on it. The creature will then travel a slide, eventually being deposited in a cage constructed of sheets of transparent aluminum. We will then be free to analyze it at our leisure. Meanwhile, I have forbidden all beaming down to the surface of the planet except on my or Mr. Spock's direct order.



Captain's Log, supplemental. The plan failed. The creature was indeed lured by the birdseed, as expected. It sped to the dish, consumed the bait, and sped off without setting off the trap. Mr. Spock is as puzzled as I, and has begun tests to discover the flaw in the design. I have sent out three search parties to see if we can box the creature in, one headed by Mr. Sulu, one by Mr. Chekov, and one by Sociologist Xontel.



Captain's Log, stardate 54342.8. Sociologist Xontel has been temporarily incapacitated. In pursuing the creature, he and his men somehow managed to cross the place where Mr. Spock's trap was set just as he completed the corrections to it. The trap was sprung, and all four of my men were suspended for a moment in mid-air, puzzled, just before they fell into the cage we constructed. We are now trying to release them with phasers, as the lock was inadvertently smashed by the impact from Sociologist Xontel's foot as he fell. I consider this a major setback. Mr. Spock considers it "fascinating."



Captain's Log, stardate 54343.4. In an all-out attempt to stop the creature once and for all, I have had a phaser rifle beamed down from the Enterprise. The creature has behaved in an extremely cunning manner, yet I am unsure whether this is a sign of actual intelligence. Lt. Uhura has been unsuccessful in her attempts to raise Starfleet Command. Meanwhile, Mr. Scott informs me that our dilithium crystals are deteriorating at an alarming rate. He has juryrigged a system that will prevent the decay for a time, but it is imperative that we find new crystals soon.



Captain's Log, supplemental. Mr. Sulu reports high energy tricorder readings from an area of the planet in which the creature has not yet been sighted. He has taken a small party, including Mr. Spock, to the high-elevation spot from which the readings emanate. I have begun to analyze the creature's movements. It seems to travel consistently over a set path. Perhaps we can corner it in a tunnel it seems to pass through frequently.



Captain's Log, stardate 54344.7. Mr. Sulu has located a cache of ACME dilithium crystals atop a high cliff. Regretfully, while collecting them, the edge of the cliff broke off, and he and Mr. Spock plummetted several hundred feet to the ground below. Strangely enough, they both survived the fall with no more than raising a cloud of dust on impact, although they did pass the chunk of rock on the way down and end up completely buried. A rescue excavation has commenced, and they should be safe shortly.



Captain's Log, stardate 54344.9. Mr. Spock has beamed up to the ship with them to assist Mr. Scott in their installation, as he forsees compatability problems. Back on the planet's surface, Mr. Chekov led seven men into the tunnel in an attempt to capture the creature in transit. A loud BEEP, BEEP was heard, and Chekov aimed the phaser rifle and commanded his men to spread out. I wish to state for the record that I would have acted similarly, and that Ensign Chekov should in no way be held responsible for the unfortunate circumstances arising from the unexpected appearance of an old Earth-style freight train. He has been beamed back up to the ship with minor injuries.



Captain's Log, stardate 54345.1. Dr. McCoy has beamed down with a hypo containing a mixture of kyranide, tri-ox compound, Scalosian concentrate, a theragram derivative, and some other items he found in unmarked containers in Sickbay. By injecting a small amount into each member of the landing party, I hope to be able to deal with the creature on its own high speed terms.



Captain's Log, supplemental. The latest experiment to deal with the strange creature has failed. As Dr. McCoy was injecting a measured dose of the compound, it abruptly appeared behind him and uttered a loud BEEP, BEEP! Dr. McCoy, understandably flustered, accidentally pressured in the entire contents of the hypo into his arm. A full security team is in pursuit of him, waiting for the effects of the drug to wear off.



Captain's Log, stardate 54345.2. I have ordered the landing party transported back to the ship. The new dilithium crystals have been successfully installed. On my responsibility, the ship is preparing to engage main phasers to attack the creature, which continues on its semi-erratic course across the planet's surface.



Captain's Log, supplemental. This is a warning to all other starships that may pass this way. Do not approach this planet! The illogical events occuring here are too much to overcome with simple science. If you have heard the events transcribed in the rest of this log, you will learn that this creature is nearly undefeatable. We channelled full ship's power through the phaser banks. Theoretically, the creature should have been destroyed; however, the energies were too much strain for the ACME crystals. The full force of the phasers backlashed over the Enterprise, engulfing her completely. At first, the only noticeable effect was a complete failure of all systems save emergency gravity and life support. Then a web of black lines spread through the Enterprise's superstructure. Next, the ship began breaking up, piece by piece, falling through the atmosphere to land on the surface of the planet. When the ship had collapsed entirely, my crew was left hanging in space for a short time, and finally each of us began to fall to the planet below. We have no theories on how any of us survived, but every crewmember has reported nothing more than a sense of uneasiness, followed by the realization that they were several hundred miles up in the air, a sinking sensation, and then a gradual drop: first the feet, then the body, and finally the head, usually wearing a resigned expression of perplexion. We are attempting now to communicate with the creature in the hopes that it will prove intelligent. Perhaps we can communicate our peaceful intentions to it. Mr. Spock has constructed a crude rocket launcher from the wreckage of the ship, and with this we hope to send the recorder marker up into space, where hopefully someone will find it. Captain James T. Kirk, of the United Federation of Planets, Captain of the Starship Enterprise, recording.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Hot Hot hot

Well its 38.9C today I just went down and jumped in the sea at the bottom of the street here, very refreshing, but by the time we got home was boiling again. My neighbour Matt has a heap of woodchips for mulch that was dumped in his driveway and he is out there barrowing it, I would help but he wouldnt give me a lift yesterday opting to go paddling on his canoe so I'm returning the favour, tut tut. If its cooler tommorow I'll go give him a hand.

The temp has dropped to 24C and it poured rain for about 10 mins what a relief.

Apple has a new device due on the market in June, it is believed to be a tablet a bit like a huge iphone, the thing that gets me is that newspapers like the NEW York Times are going to start charging for the news next year, reportedly due to the new apple device. The thing is, I think the Internet and freedom of information and the global way the Internet works along with the size of the thing would just mean that the NYT newspaper wouldnt get any trade, I mean if there was anything vaugly newsworthy in the paper it will be being talked about on hundreds of  blogs, facebook sites and forums almost as soon as the paper hits the press if not before.

Australia is a very confusing place, taking up a large amount of the bottom half of the planet. It is recognizable from orbit because of many unusual features, including what at first looks like an enormous bite taken out of its southern edge; a wall of sheer cliffs which plunge deep into the girting sea. Geologists assure us that this is simply an accident of geomorphology and plate tectonics, but they still call it the "Great Australian Bight" proving that not only are they covering up a more frightening theory but they can't spell either!

The first of the confusing things about Australia is the status of the place. Where other landmasses and sovereign lands are classified as either continent, island, or country, Australia is considered all three. Typically, it is unique in this.
second confusing thing about Australia are the animals. They can be divided into three categories: Poisonous, Odd, and Sheep. It is true that of the 10 most poisonous arachnids on the planet, Australia has 9 of them. Actually, it would be more accurate to say that of the 9 most poisonous arachnids, Australia has all of them. However there are curiously few snakes, possible because the spiders have killed them all.
But even the spiders won't go near the sea. Any visitors should be careful to check inside boots (before putting them on), under toilet seats (before sitting down) and generally everywhere else. A stick is very useful for this task.
At this point, we would like to mention the Platypus - estranged relative of the mammal, which has a duck-bill, otter's tail, webbed feet, lays eggs, detects its aquatic prey in the same way as the electric eel and has venomous barbs attached to its hind legs, thus combining all 'typical' Australian attributes into a single improbable creature.
The last confusing thing about Australia is the inhabitants.
First, a short history:
Sometime around 40,000 years ago, some people arrived in boats from the north. They ate all the available food, and a lot of them died. The ones who survived learned respect for the balance of nature, man's proper place in the scheme of things and spiders. They settled in and spent a lot of the intervening time making up strange stories.
Then, around 200 years ago, Europeans arrived in boats from the north. More accurately, European convicts were sent, with a few deranged and stupid people in charge. They tried to plant their crops in Autumn (failing to take account of the reversal of the seasons when moving from the top half of the planet to the bottom), ate all their food, and a lot of them died.
About then the sheep arrived, and have been treasured ever since. It is interesting to note here that the Europeans always consider themselves vastly superior to any other race they encounter, since they can lie, cheat, steal, and litigate (marks of a civilised culture they say) - whereas all the Aboriginals can do is happily survive being left in the middle of a vast red-hot desert, equipped with a stick.
Eventually, the new lot of people stopped being Europeans on Extended Holiday and became Australians. The changes are subtle, but deep, caused by the mind-stretching expanses of nothingness and eerie quiet, where a person can sit perfectly still and look deep inside themselves to the core of their essence, their reasons for being, and the necessity of checking inside your boots every morning for fatal surprises. They also picked up the most finely tuned sense of irony in the world, and the Aboriginal gift for making up stories. Be warned.

There is also the matter of the beaches. Australian beaches are simply the nicest and best in the entire world. Although anyone actually venturing into the sea will have to contend with sharks, stinging jellyfish, stonefish (a fish which sits on the bottom of the sea, pretends to be a rock and has venomous barbs sticking out of its back that will kill just from the pain) and surfboarders.
However, watching a beach sunset is worth the risk. As a result of all this hardship, dirt, thirst and wombats, you would expect Australians to be a dour lot. Instead, they are genial, jolly, cheerful and always willing to share a kind word with a stranger.
Faced with insurmountable odds and impossible problems, they smile disarmingly and look for a stick. Major engineering feats have been performed with sheets of corrugated iron, string, and mud.
Alone of all the races on earth, they seem to be free from the 'Grass is Greener on the other side of the fence' syndrome, and roundly proclaim that Australia is, in fact, the other side of that fence. They call the land "Oz", "Godzone" (a verbal contraction of "God's Own Country") and "Best bloody place on earth, bar none, strewth."

The irritating thing about this is they may be right.



There are some traps for the unsuspecting traveler, though. Do not, under any circumstances, suggest that the beer is imperfect, unless you are comparing it to another kind of Australian beer. Do not wear a Hawaiian shirt.



Religion and Politics are fairly safe topics of conversation, (Australians don't care too much about either) but Sport is a minefield.
The only correct answer to "So, howdya' like our country, eh?" is "Best (insert your own regional swear word here) country in the world!". It is very likely that, on arriving, some cheerful Australians will 'adopt' you on your first night, and take you to a pub where Australian Beer is served.
Despite the obvious danger, do not refuse. It is a form of initiation rite. You will wake up late the next day with an astonishing hangover, a foul taste in your mouth, and wearing strange clothes.
Your hosts will usually make sure you get home, and waive off any legal difficulties with "It's his first time in Australia, so we took him to the pub", to which the policeman will sagely nod and close his notebook. Be sure to tell the story of these events to every other Australian you encounter, adding new embellishments at every stage and noting how strong the beer was.
Thus you will be accepted into this unique culture.
Most Australians are now urban dwellers, having discovered the primary use of electricity, which is air-conditioning and refrigerators.

Typical Australian sayings:-
* "G'Day!"
* "She'll be right mate."
Tips to Surviving Australia
* Don't ever put your hand down a hole for any reason WHATSOEVER.
* The beer is stronger than you think, regardless of how strong you think it is.
* Always carry a stick.
* Air-conditioning is imperative.
* Do not attempt to use Australian slang, unless you are a trained linguist and extremely good in a fist fight
* Wear thick socks.
* Take good maps. Stopping to ask directions only works when there are people nearby.
* If you leave the urban areas, carry several litres of water with you at all times, or you will die.
* Even in the most embellished stories told by Australians, there is always a core of truth that it is unwise to ignore

Friday, January 22, 2010

new car


Well I picked up my new Subaru Forester and very nice it is too, now I shall have to work untill I'm 167 years old to pay it off but hey you only live once ehh. I like this car as it has a few gadgets so far I have almost bumped into a dog, a rather large granny type woman and a mack truck fiddling with buttons but I',m over the fiddling stage now so the world should be safer. The salesman almost talked me into having the DVD, which is part of the Sat Nav system adjusted so it would play when the car is being driven but  I had a think about it and my TV plays much better DVD's (size wise) and I shouldnt be watching movies while driving anyway lol and no doubt the insurance companies would check that if  Iever had an accident . I'm actually proud that I didnt have it cobnverted as this is very unlike me lol.

I can hear thunder and its been a 34C day here so I hope theres no hail coming. My next door neighbour just had a load of mulch delivered and the truck driver was nice enough to pop into my office and say my car might get dusty if i left it where it was, I thought that was nice of him.



Wednesday, January 20, 2010

facebook

I only had a short walk with the dog this morning as I was going to the gym at 1100 unfortunately when I got there they had changed the time to 1000 so it didnt happen, I might go and jump in the water after work as its a hot afternoon here to get a bit of excersise.

After Mondays tennis ruffians did their thing, I thought I would do some research on why Croatians and Serbs dont get on so well, the Croatian War of Independence was a war fought in Croatia from 1991 to 1995. It was fought between the Croatian government, having declared independence from the Socialist Federal Republic of Yugoslavia, and both the Yugoslav People's Army (JNA) and Serb forces, who established the self-proclaimed Republic of Serbian Krajina (RSK) within Croatia.

Initially, the war was waged between Croatian police forces and Serbs living in the Yugoslav Republic of Croatia.
Yugoslavia was composed of ethnic and religious groups that had been historical rivals, even bitter enemies, including the Serbs (Orthodox Christians), Croats (Catholics) and ethnic Albanians (Muslims).

Ok so they have a difference in Religious beliefs and some deep seated civil war issues.

In my opinion no nations flags should be allowed at the Australian tennis open, everyone who has been arrested at the venue should have a lifetime ban from not just this venue but all sports venues and the police should prosecute any person inciting racial hate in Australia. We have Australia day coming up again next week I wonder if Cronulla will be the site of more disgraceful  Muzzie bashing this year, not that they dont deserve it arriving in droves with their bats and weapons. I shant be there but I hope 100,000 police are.

Anyway onto lighter stuff = Facebook, nope The parents of little girl Margarita Tarantina are hereditary animal trainers. They put their daughter into a cage with alligators. The girl’s parents received two alligators - Misha and Masha - shortly before Rita was born. So they were raised together and made friends. Now they cannot stand being without one another. During four years of living together, the crocodiles never bit and did not even scar the little girl.

“Alligators are brutal predators, but they have reason. The reptiles understand that Margarita is just a child and they must not hurt her,” the head of the unusual family, Sergey Tarantin says.
“They like her, and she takes advantage of it. Rita likes Misha in particular. She can play with his paw or lie on his back, while she-crocodile Masha is more capricious,” the father said.

Shaking my head here and eyes are crossed.

OK Facebook, now I have a facebook page, made it ages ago and never went back as its not really my scene, my friend Beverley and millions of others are however right into it, I got a message yesterday said "Beverley just earned the 'Egg-celent Discovery' yellow ribbon in FarmVille!

Beverley got a big ol' reward for being such a great farmer and wants to share their success with you!"
WHAT ?
"Beverley just found some Treasured Golden Mystery Eggs and wants to say thank you!

Beverley just harvested their chicken coop and found some Treasured Golden Mystery Eggs, and wants to thank their friends for feeding the chickens"
I THINK I"M LOSSING IT

Monday, January 18, 2010

Excersise and diet

I fell over yesterday dislocated my ankle and sprained my wrist on my bad arm, typical. I have been walking 2.5 miles a day since New Year in an attempt to shed some KG's. Its working as I've shed 4.4 kg so far but I'm sore after my spill yesterday.

I had this customer the other day came back with a PC I'd sold him last year, he said
"I bought this off you about 6 months ago and its never worked" I said "You should have taken it straight back" anyway I went back through my records and it was sold last February so thats almost a year ago now the Mother Board is caput and its too expensive to warrant repair. Nowhere else would give the guy the time of day but I'm going to replace it with another second hand pc, why ? well I took the hard drive out and checked when it was last accessed and it was as he said not long after he bought it there had been no programs added or owt. Just seems weird that he would have waited 9 months or so before returning it.

I'll never make a fortune in business I'm too soft lol but I get a nice feeling when i can help folks out, I got this email this week
Hi Rob,

Thank you so much for repairing my computer and retrieving my files on what
I thought was an non-repairable hard drive.
I thought I had lost all of my photo's (7 years worth - since my son was 3 yrs old) ,but you
managed to save them all. I cant thank you enough.
I'd like to thank you for your friendly, very competitive and efficient service.
I wouldn't go anywhere else.
Thanks Rob

:) I managed to get the drive working by putting it in the freezer in a bag overnight the cold was enough to shrink the plates enough for me to get the files off :)
 
If you haven't any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart trouble. ~Bob Hope
 
If anyone reading this has a computer Back up your files.